Good afternoon, everyone, and welcome to another NachoTuesday! Today, I have Lewis from Guaman Consulting with us. If you don’t mind, Lewis, could you introduce your company and let us know what you do? (00:39) Sure! I am a mindset and performance coach. I help leaders become higher-performing versions of themselves. My focus is on Peak Performance, so I work with clients either one-on-one or through corporate trainings. I also run a men’s group, which has been amazing. (01:10) You do a lot of work to help people with their business relationships and identify how to build strong relationships. Could you dive into some tips on how to approach different business dynamics, such as employee-to-employee relationships or employee-to-boss interactions? So, whether you’re a solo entrepreneur or leading a team, you could be losing productivity, relationships, or even credibility if these dynamics are not managed well. One of the first tips is to develop curiosity about the other person and to build relationships by sharing your own challenges as a manager. A key point is that if you’re in charge and you show that even leaders face difficulties or are not perfect, you reveal your human side. Showing vulnerability can help your team open up, be more honest about their needs, and ultimately become more engaged and productive. This approach can lead to better overall performance. (02:03) That makes a lot of sense. So, if employees are afraid to share their true selves or admit mistakes, they might withhold information or issues, which can negatively impact business efficiency. Effective communication, both horizontally with peers and vertically with management, is crucial for performance. Without it, the company may suffer from reduced efficiency and effectiveness. (03:00) What are your thoughts on the "carrot versus stick" approach? Should managers rely more on rewards or punishments, or is there a balance to be found? There’s definitely a mix required. I don’t think many managers fully grasp the balance between rewards and discipline. Just like there are different parenting styles, there are various management styles, and many of them can be effective. Too much reward (the "carrot") can lead to complacency, where employees might think that there are no consequences for failing to meet goals. On the other hand, too much punishment (the "stick") can lead to burnout and a lack of trust in management. The best approach is to find a balance. Managers need to be able to lead effectively while building trust and relationships with their team. This balance helps the team navigate tough times and prepares them for future challenges. (03:27) Yes, people generally prefer to work hard for leaders they respect and like. Balancing the "carrot" and "stick" approaches helps in maintaining a motivated and trusting team. (04:26) What’s even better is when individuals know why they’re there and feel safe within the office. Psychological safety makes everything easier and reduces stress all around. There needs to be both "carrot" and "stick" approaches, but do you think it’s beneficial to hire managers who play the "good cop, bad cop" roles, or should managers blend both approaches themselves? (04:55) I think it’s best if different managers have distinct roles. Some managers are naturally more inclined towards the "stick" approach, while others might be more emotionally intelligent and inclined towards the "carrot" approach. Ideally, every manager should be emotionally intelligent, but some may be better at fostering a collaborative and supportive environment. If you have a good cop-bad cop dynamic, it should be underpinned by a shared goal. Regardless of whether a manager is tougher or softer, they should align with the overall objective. For teams with multiple managers, it's beneficial to play to each other's strengths. (05:48) For teams with only one manager, that person must balance both approaches themselves. They need to manage performance without allowing themselves to be walked over while also building trust and avoiding burnout. It’s crucial to be both firm and supportive, adjusting as necessary based on the team’s needs. (06:16) What are your thoughts on employee-to-employee relationships? Do you have any tips for improving how employees get along with each other? (06:48) Absolutely. One approach is to focus on value-based conversations. For example, instead of just discussing surface-level interests, delve into what people find enjoyable or challenging about their hobbies. I had a client who attended multiple networking events across different industries to create opportunities and build real relationships. Instead of focusing on what you have in common on the surface, ask deeper questions about what people enjoy and find meaningful in their activities. (07:13) For instance, if someone enjoys playing Dungeons & Dragons and you don’t know much about it, ask them what they find most enjoyable about the problem-solving aspect. Conversely, if you play soccer, you might share a memorable experience or challenge you faced. By engaging in these deeper conversations, you can connect over shared values and experiences, fostering mutual respect and understanding. (09:03) With remote work becoming more prevalent, how do you think it has impacted relationship-building among employees and managers? (09:28) Remote work definitely impacts relationship-building. Without in-person interactions, it’s harder to build relationships. Managers should focus on value-based questions and create scenarios that foster team connections, even through virtual platforms like Zoom. While it’s important to get creative with virtual interactions, it’s equally important to ensure that in-person meetings, when possible, are meaningful and not just checkbox activities. This helps in building respect and understanding among team members. (10:52) Additionally, if you're running a team, it's crucial to facilitate relationship-building if your team members lack the skills to do so themselves. If you’re unsure how to facilitate this, consider working with someone who specializes in team dynamics and culture. (11:16) How do you see a company’s mission aligning with employees’ inherent values? Is it important for leaders to connect the company’s mission with individual motivations to help employees find purpose and create value? (12:04) Yes, it’s essential to align the company’s mission with employees’ values. This alignment creates a positive culture where people feel they are contributing meaningfully. To build this culture, you need to gather honest feedback from employees about the actual culture versus the stated culture. Managers should be transparent about failures and use them as learning opportunities. The goal is to create an environment where employees can be themselves, feel respected, and contribute to a shared purpose. (13:24) To foster a positive culture and inclusivity, managers should focus on being open to feedback and encouraging honest conversations. If employees feel their input is valued and they can influence changes, they are more likely to remain engaged and motivated. (14:15) Creating a culture where it’s okay to fail and innovate is crucial. If management models this mindset, employees are likely to follow suit. Building trust through better conversations and accepting mistakes as part of the growth process helps create a supportive and productive work environment. (15:22) Trust is a key aspect of this. When employees feel they can’t trust their managers or that their contributions aren’t valued, they may disengage or start looking for other opportunities. It’s important for managers to show vulnerability and encourage their team to excel, fostering an environment where everyone feels supported and motivated. (15:46) When failure happens, you know what could be done to remedy it, but it's more from a coaching standpoint rather than just punishing someone. Encouraging people by letting them know that failure is okay and happens is important. However, it's crucial not to make it a repeated process. From a management standpoint, it's also okay to show your vulnerabilities, but not to the extent that you appear inept. Most managers make mistakes, and if you can own up to them and demonstrate that you’ve learned from them, others are more likely to follow your example. (16:12) Mental health is a significant topic right now, and while many people discuss it, not everyone puts it into practice. Addressing mental health as an important aspect of overall well-being is crucial. (16:40) Some tips for improving mental health include the ability to say "no" effectively. This could be related to tasks, people, or even yourself. Additionally, resilience in difficult times is important. Business and life can be challenging, and it's normal to feel irritated, angry, or anxious. Mental health struggles are regular, and understanding how you react in both calm and challenging times is vital. For example, if you know how you act when things go wrong, you can better manage your resilience. (17:09) Resilience means being the "warrior in the garden," whether you're male or female. You need to be there for your team, your family, and most importantly, yourself. Many people neglect self-care, which can lead to loss of time, money, opportunity, and relationships. Recognizing this issue is important, and it should be addressed seriously rather than with ridicule. (17:40) Another aspect of mental health is your physical environment and the people around you. What you hear regularly, whether from roommates, family, or through self-talk, impacts your mental state. Reflecting on whether you are acting in alignment with your values and purpose is crucial. Engaging in self-work or seeking external feedback can help determine if you are on the right path. (18:13) It’s important to avoid taking things personally, such as failure or disagreements. For instance, if you have a task that you believe should be done differently, it’s okay to voice your opinion and discuss it with your manager. Healthy debate can lead to better decision-making. (18:44) Surrounding yourself with the right people is another critical aspect. Identifying good or bad fits in relationships involves understanding your values and those of the people you interact with. When you know your own values, you can better assess whether someone else aligns with them. This helps in forming relationships that are both personal and professional. (19:09) Building relationships should be intentional. Understanding your values allows you to express them through your work and interactions. When evaluating potential relationships, ask questions that reveal deeper values and ethics. This way, you can make informed decisions about whether to work with or refer someone based on shared values and vision. (19:35) It’s essential to let relationships be decisions rather than just letting things happen. Evaluate whether you are staying in a job or relationship because it aligns with your values or if you're just settling. Shared values often lead to better collaboration and effective teamwork. (20:05) For job seekers, expressing resilience and grit is attractive to employers. Whether you’re new to the job market or an experienced executive, demonstrating your values and competencies can make you a strong candidate. (20:31) Goal setting plays a role in building better relationships with yourself and others. Long-term goals and visions are important, but short-term and midterm goals are equally crucial. Set goals for productivity, personal upkeep, and things that energize you. (20:58) For example, waking up early and feeling energized requires setting short-term goals that motivate you. Instead of just waking up to get to work, find activities that you look forward to. This could be exercising, reading, or engaging in hobbies. (21:30) Creating a choice and an energizing reason for waking up can greatly impact your motivation and productivity. If you understand the importance of these daily decisions, it empowers you to handle challenges better. (21:58) Relating this to hiking or mountaineering, if you only focus on the daunting goal of reaching the top, you may feel overwhelmed. Instead, taking one step at a time and celebrating small achievements helps you stay committed and motivated. (22:29) Often, people fail because they focus too much on the final goal and underestimate the value of short-term progress. Self-doubt and impostor syndrome can hinder progress, but focusing on incremental achievements can help overcome these challenges. (23:27) Regarding how to react when things go wrong, start broad and then become specific. Initially, assess what went wrong before reacting. People often respond impulsively, but taking a moment to evaluate the situation can lead to more effective solutions. (23:52) The "fight or flight" response is common, but it's important to assess the situation before deciding on a course of action. Reflecting on your reaction and learning from past experiences can improve your approach to future challenges. (24:19) Understanding your values and having a clear vision helps in making better decisions and maintaining resilience. The journey may be challenging, but staying true to your values and taking one step at a time can lead to success. (24:43) Ultimately, perspective is everything. Viewing challenges as opportunities to learn and grow rather than insurmountable obstacles can make a significant difference in how you handle them. (32:10) There's "fight" and "flight," but as long as the brain is having a response to what's happening, it's engaged—it's not doing nothing. I've always remembered that because it clarifies that we’re not just in fight or flight mode. What's accurate is that you first observe what's happening, and then you make a decision about what to do. You can choose to fight or to flee, or even decide to confront a tough conversation. If someone offends you or you strongly disagree with them, even if you don’t have evidence, you might feel that they are wrong or wasting your time. (32:36) I’ve had plenty of such conversations while managing teams and dealing with different kinds of people. When you face opposition, it's easy to waste a lot of energy and damage relationships if you react automatically. This reaction is often 90% defensive: "I know you’re wrong. Stop saying this because this is what’s right. Just follow me, and we’ll sort this out." This kind of clash is brunt and unnecessary, especially when coming from person to person, particularly in business where we’re constantly creating new things. (33:01) The key is to first understand what’s happening. After observing, make a decision based on your emotional intelligence and adaptability as an individual. What do you do when things go wrong? This can be improved and refined. Personally, I take in the situation and decide what to do, while also reminding myself of who I am. Knowing who you are when things go wrong, when you're at the top, or when everything around you is falling apart is crucial. This understanding ties back to the values and principles we discussed earlier. (34:02) Your actions should reflect these values, both with yourself and your team. We could delve deeper into this, but it's important to understand that feedback is critical for growth. Taking feedback yourself, looking at it objectively, and taking action are essential. Giving feedback effectively is also crucial to help others grow. (35:11) For receiving feedback, think about how you’d interact with a Tamagotchi or similar virtual pet from the '80s or '90s. If you discipline it too harshly, it might run away or die. The same concept applies to feedback; creating a space for honest conversations is vital. Reflect on how difficult it is to have specific conversations with your parents, especially if they grew up with different views. This challenge is similar when giving feedback—finding a middle ground is essential. (36:10) One of the most challenging yet rewarding aspects is restructuring emotions and understanding where others are coming from, just as I have worked on with my parents. Creating that middle ground is not straightforward, but it's something you build together. Feedback should be uncomfortable at times. If you're responsible for someone else, such as a manager or company owner, discomfort is part of the process. Not addressing this discomfort means missing out on valuable opportunities. (37:06) Aligning values with growth is crucial. If your goal is to help others grow, seeing your team members become successful and even start their own companies is a sign of true leadership. Cultivating and growing people, and aligning feedback with their interests and values, will make the process smoother. (38:02) A high-performing team can also be a well-rested team. As a manager, you can perform at a high level, apply pressure when necessary, but also detach and spend time rejuvenating. Creating the right culture involves incremental progress, working on feedback, communication, processes, and building deep relationships based on trust. (39:20) Consider every individual and business as a grand castle, filled with untapped potential. Focus on building one brick at a time. Strength is achieved by creating a solid foundation and gradually expanding. This approach applies to both personal and professional growth. (40:14) Managing a business is like constructing a castle. Work on each aspect systematically—addressing feedback, communication, and optimization while building strong relationships. Each part of the team and culture may require attention and adjustment as you build up other areas. (41:12) Don’t micromanage everything. Trust your team to handle specific tasks, like managing the gate of a castle, ensuring the right people come in and the wrong ones are kept out. (41:38) If you are a professional, founder, manager, or executive and feel held back by your mindset or not achieving peak performance, let’s talk. You're potentially losing time, money, or relationships, including your relationship with yourself, which is the most important. (42:05) You can contact me via LinkedIn or through my website, LSGuaman.com. I offer free assessment calls to help you develop a game plan. If I believe I can assist you, the consultation is free of charge. My goal is to help you become a better version of yourself, achieve greater success, and enjoy life more fully. (42:42) Feel free to connect with us through our services marketplace. Adding your free consultation offer to your profile could be beneficial. Many companies focus too much on immediate tasks and neglect the foundational aspects, such as building relationships and an inclusive culture. (43:07) I value today’s discussion and believe there’s much to learn from it. I appreciate your time and look forward to growing our businesses together. (43:34) Thanks for having me, Andy. I appreciate it.